Thursday, July 19, 2012

Chris-Crossing the Country with Jan

Okay, I’m either the worst routing scheduler on the planet or I’m trying to build up my frequent flyer miles in one week because I’m flying back and fourth from the west coast to the east coast 3 times in about 7 days! I’m enjoying the work, but I seem to be booking myself as far away from Los Angeles as humanly possible while still staying in the U.S. Last Thursday  I flew from LA to Newport, R.I., did my Finding the Funny in Communications keynote to a group Friday morning and then flew home to pet my cats.  24 hours later I went to Florida and then the next day I flew to my current location, San Francisco!

what i got from the waiter for my overpriced dinner

When I’m traveling though, I do like to learn some stuff.

At the Rhode Island group, I went to their clambake. Since I didn’t know anyone at the reception, I talked to the clambake master. Very nice and knowledgeable guy. He said there’s only 3 clambake masters on the island (Newport is an island), and it takes a lot of practice and skill to do the bake just right. It’s not like tossing steaks on a grill (okay, I don’t know how to grill either). He said you heat up the rocks and the rocks do the baking (like charcoal maybe?), but you’ve got to put the right amount of rocks in the pit. They also use special seaweed that has pockets of water in it, like little bubbles. These bubbles heat up and that’s what steams the fish.

Speaking of Newport, R.I. being an island, it is named “goat island” because in the olden days (before Facebook), people put their goats on the island. Since it was surrounded by water, and the goats can’t swim, the goats were stuck on the island. Pretty ingenious. There are 2 bridges to get over to the island. . . I was thinking I’d see some Billy Goats under those bridges. . .no luck. Ha ha.

I did a quick turnaround and headed back, only getting to stay in Newport for about 22 hours . . . darn. Of course this group announced that next years 2 conferences will be held in Arizona and Oregon respectively. . .yeah, that would’ve been a little closer.

Florida was good too. I asked the concierge if there was anything I could do besides Disney. She said “Downtown Disney.” I said, no, anything BESIDES Disney. She said there’s a little town that Walt Disney created . . . hum, she wasn’t getting my message. I went to Downtown Disney for my share of screaming children and overpriced meals. The group was fun though, so that made up for it.

I’m enjoying flying more and more now that Southwest is getting the internet on board. That will change my life not to land with 50 emails to answer!

San Francisco is turning out to be fun – great weather and I’m right on the water, so I’ve been walking up and down the embarcadero. . .it would be good for my health except for all the ice cream shops I keep popping into.

Safe Travels everyone!



Friday, June 29, 2012

Traveling the Smokey Rocky Mountains

Okay, I’m trying to resurrect this comedy travel blog one last time because I go to some neat (is that still a word) places! Last week I was in Pueblo, Colorado doing a show for a women’s event. . .but I also got to hike in Garden of the Gods and Rocky Mountain National Park! Great places . . . and I’m so sorry to see the fires that are ravishing the parks.

I brought my friend Diane with me and we had some memorable experiences. . . like Pikes Peak. 1.5 hours up to the top via the train and they wouldn’t let us off due to a gas leak.  .AHHH. We turned around and headed back down. I felt bad for one woman who told me on the way up that she had to go to the bathroom so bad she didn’t know if she’d make it. When they wouldn’t let us off the train, she burst into tears. On the way down we made a special stop for her to run behind a tree. . .while 100 or so people waited for her. Then we went down further and stopped at the mid-way point for all of us to use the porta potties. I can’t say the staff was especially nice – the woman on the microphone must have been new because she read from a script. And even though the train wasn’t packed, she would not let anyone get up from their seats and “cross the aisle” when there was something to look at on the other side. I guess the power of the mic went to her head!

Pueblo was fun . . .once we found a place to hike! (picture). The hotel desk clerk had no idea that there was a mountain with hiking trails 30 minutes from the hotel. She sent us to a nature center. The woman there was on the phone for so long that we gave up and ended up talking with some locals who sent us to Beulah, CO. Cute, small (like 2 stores) town. . the woman at one of the stores told us where the hiking trails were. . .

We wrapped up the trip by having a drink at the Stanley Hotel – which is the prototype for the hotel in the movie The Shinning. It was fun and scenic.

This week I’m in Chicago. . .no hiking, but lots of radio. We’re doing our Baby Boomer Comedy Show ( for the good folks at Zanies Comedy Club. If you’re nearby, come on down!



Friday, May 27, 2011

Parasailing, jet skiing and snorkeling OH MY!!

What a great month! I've had some really fun comedy shows and humor keynotes - from Massachusetts to Arizona and states in between. Some critical care nurses kicked it off early - they were a blast and I'd be happy to be in the ER with them any time. . .ok, not really, but if I HAD to go to the ER, they would at least make it a lot funner. I also got to have some fun with grocery store people (they weren't as large as I expected them to be - ha ha - I would be 3,000 pounds if I ran a grocery store) and apartment managers. . .my landlord was NEVER that much fun. . . plus a bunch more . . .

I also made it over to Cabo, Mexico for some fun in the sun. . .we did every thing from parasailing - in which i was NOT STRAPPED IN CORRECTLY. . .I'm on the left. In the U.S. they would NEVER have sent me up that way - I almost did some high diving into the water. . .luckily it was only 8 minutes.

And we did zip lining, snorkeling, dinner cruising, jet skiing and laying around with a frozen drink - a LOT of that actually - but we did get our exercise because we had to swim over to the bar!

What a great way to kick off the summer. . . my big challenge is to learn how to ride my motorcycle - I'd like to get it down to only 1 or 2 honking cars by the end of the weekend.

Have a great Memorial Day, and check out my animated video on YouTube - click on the link below!

The Funny Side of Working in an Office

Safe travels. ..


Wednesday, May 04, 2011

When I was 10 years old I told my parents that when I turn 16, I was going to buy a motorcycle, drive cross country from our house in Virginia to California and become a comedian. Well, I did it, albeit it took a little longer than I expected. I became a comedian in my 30’s, I moved to Los Angeles in my 40’s and just this week bought a motorcycle – in my . . oh, never mind! Yamaha 650 V-star for you bikers. I actually bought a motor scooter a couple years ago as a warm up… I bought it because that’s what happens when you wreck it on the test drive (true!). But I really did like it, and now I decided to move up, and my new goal is to now be able to get it into 1st gear without stalling . . . I’m sure it’ll happen. I went from 80 cc’s on the scooter to 650 cc’s. . more power baby!

My first ride this past Saturday was 2 hours and only one person yelled something at me. I’m pretty sure it was not that he liked my bike, but luckily between the engine noise and my helmet, I couldn’t hear him. I am having a problem with stalling out though. After trying repeatedly to get it into first gear, two 10-year-old boys asked me if I needed help. I said, that I’m fine, it’s just a new bike. They both gave the thumbs up and said “cooolll.” I’m not sure what type of help they could’ve given me. . .a ride on their handle bars.

ANYWAY.. . I’m off to ride this weekend. . .see my cool pics below!



Friday, April 15, 2011

Random Travels!

Today's blog is about nothing in particular except random travels.. .  .I'm getting more and more work on the east coast, which is great for frequent flyer miles, but not so great for my sleeping! I was just in D.C. doing my Finding the Funny in Communicaitons program (how to put humor into your business communications to get what you want) for some volunteer leaders, and it went great! They were very receptive to adding humor to their communications to get people to listen to them and get involved in their organization.

I also went to vegas - okay that was a few weeks ago. . .saw the sharks at Mandalay Bay, along with some cute fishes. . . though we didn't sleep with them. Get it? ha ha. . see why I'm a comedian. I met up with my sister & her family there. . .lots of fun - see a fish we met below. . .
 Ok, I've also been in Pennsylvania for 2 different groups and right now I'm headed up to Monterey this weekend.. .for fun. No one wants me to speak (unless spoken to I guess). OH, and the best news. . .which I will elaborate on when i actually get some things squared away here. . .I passed the motorcycle DMV written test today and passed the driving part the other week (actually I took a class that allowed me to waive the driving part if i passed. . .and I did). I ALSO had to take part of the drivers written test today because CA wants people to - instead of just blanketly renewing their license. I guess since my picture is 11  years old, they want me to actually look like it! That's fine, except i didn't realize they were going to take it today. . .so I'm now stuck with a crappy picture AGAIN. More on the cycle next week. I actually bought one, but i can't pick it up yet . . .I'm very excited.

I'm in town (LA that is) all of next week and then off to the midwest for some fun programs and to hang out with Kent Rader. . .the co-star with me in the Baby Boomer Comedy Show. . .more on that later as well.

Have a great weekend.. . life is great!



Wednesday, March 02, 2011

Hiking in Death Valley!

Okay, my 2nd favorite (old) sport is hiking the national parks. . last week it was death valley where it actually SNOWED in the desert! Very cool.. .or FREEZING I might add. But we hit most all of the major hikes in the 2 days before the snow, and then did a few in-doorish type things for the snow days.

We went to see Scotty's Castle (below) . .a millionaire guy befriended Scotty and made him a castle. . long story, that just makes me wonder why things like that NEVER happen to me (millionaire befriending a comedian???).

AND we went to Death Valley Junction to the Amargosa Opera House (below) to see Marta Beckett. She moved there like a million years ago and fixed up an opera house so that she'd have a place to perform in. It was my 4th time there (Ron's 5th) and Marta still gets on stage once a week to do a show... though at 80+ years old, she actually did sit down theater (the opposite of standup comedy). We also stayed in the haunted motel .. something that needs fixing up. . .and we got room 9, which was the most "active." We met some ghost-busters who came in to our room at 3 a.m. to do a reading. And YES, we heard a ghost tell us to "get out."

If I did it right, I've got pictures up on Facebook of our experience. . .what a fun trip!
More later on the ghosts. . .oh, and by the way, if you didn't know, death valley is in Nevada. . .how do I know that. . . ???

Take care!


Tuesday, February 22, 2011

My new favorite sport!

I went snowshoeing for the first time ever this past Sunday - WHAT A BLAST!! We (me, Diane and Sharon) went up a tram in Palm Springs to the top of the mountain where they had 3-4 feet of snow at least. There were tons of trails, and even though by my calculation there had to be at least 3000 people up there (tram holds 80, goes up every 10 minutes startign at 8 a.m.), we really didn't see many people at all. The day was gorgeous - it said 18 degrees, but it was definately warmer than that and no wind.

None of us had ever done this before, but it didn't take any instruction to figure out. . .it's just hiking with big pancakes on your feet. Now I've got a new sport that I can spend my $ on. . .though if you buy the shoes, you can probably snow shoe on mountains for free.

The tram in Palm Springs (not free!), was fun - it rotates around so you can see 360 as you go up and down the mountain. Click on the link above. . .they've got a webcam.  We snow shoed for 3 hours and then had fries and beers in the cocktail lounge - we didn't go to the restaurant because as Sharon pointed out "cocktail lounge implies no kids!"

Okay, just thought I'd point out my fun weekend. I'm off to Death Valley at the end of the week. . .2 complete ends of the spectrum!